006 | When AI Ghosts for You: The New Workplace Faux Pas
You scheduled the call. They missed the meeting. But their AI note-taker showed up right on time. Ghosting just went digital—and it’s raising new questions about trust, etiquette, and the future of human connection in business.
Ghosting 2.0: When Your AI Attends the Meeting Without You
Ghosting in business used to mean silence after a pitch or an unanswered follow-up email. Today, it’s the digital double-whammy: your meeting partner doesn’t show, but their AI note-taker logs in anyway. The insult? You weren’t even worth their time—just their tech’s.
“It’s the ultimate snub,” says Valerie Cobb. “Your client skips the call, but the robot still shows up. What’s that even say about our work culture right now?”
The awkwardness of being greeted by an AI instead of a human raises questions about etiquette, expectations, and emotional investment. If a company can’t make time for a 30-minute conversation, are they really interested—or just data-harvesting?
Digital Dissonance: When Automation Replaces Accountability
This trend reflects a broader issue: business automation is outpacing relationship-building. AI tools like Otter, Fireflies, and Fathom are now expected to catch every word—but who’s actually listening? More importantly, who’s accountable?
“There’s a time and place for automation,” notes Melanie Asher, MBA. “But when your AI note-taker is present without you, it signals avoidance—not efficiency.”
While some leaders embrace AI for efficiency, others worry that it undermines trust. Especially in early-stage meetings where connection—not content—is king, the presence of AI without context can feel invasive.
When to Allow AI—and When to Keep It Out
So what’s the protocol?
🟣 For first-time meetings: leave the bots at home.
🟣 For sensitive or client-facing topics: ask for permission.
🟣 For internal huddles or task-based meetings: automate away.
Both hosts agree: AI has its place—but it should never replace presence.
“I type a gazillion words per minute,” says Cobb. “And for me, note-taking helps me focus. But that’s human effort—not artificial presence.”
The Psychology Behind Ghosting in the Digital Age
The ghosting trend isn’t just a scheduling mishap—it’s a symptom of broader behavioral shifts. Social media taught us how to block, unfollow, and “leave on read.” That same mindset now spills into professional relationships, especially as people hide behind their screens.
From the dating world to job interviews, ghosting has become an accepted (if detested) behavior. But when it reaches high-stakes business deals or strategic partnerships, it becomes more than rude—it’s reputationally risky.
Why AI Tools Are Making Us Lazy—And Anxious
AI-driven note-takers can support multitasking, but they can also become a crutch. And for neurodivergent or multilingual team members, they’re invaluable tools for comprehension and follow-through. But without clear boundaries, the line between helpful and harmful gets blurry fast.
What happens when your default is to record, track, and automate every conversation? You lose the nuances of connection—eye contact, vocal tone, real-time empathy. And let’s be honest: no AI bot is going to tell you when your Zoom energy is off or your pitch didn’t land.
Actionable Insights
✔️ Set meeting norms: Explicitly state when note-takers (AI or human) are appropriate.
✔️ Lead with presence: First meetings should be about rapport, not recording.
✔️ Use AI to enhance, not replace: Let tools create workflows, not stand in for people.
✔️ Respect the boundaries: Always ask before recording or documenting sensitive conversations.
AI tools are here to stay—but they shouldn’t replace professional presence. Whether you’re a founder navigating digital overload or a team leader setting culture cues, the rule is simple: show up first, automate second. As the line between personal and professional gets thinner, remember this: if your AI is showing up more than you are, it might be time to rethink who’s running the meeting.
